


Katabasis

by theladyscribe



Category: Hockey RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fusion, Alternate Universe - Greek Mythology, M/M, Pittsburgh Penguins
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-11
Updated: 2015-04-11
Packaged: 2018-03-22 09:54:59
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,876
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3724531
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theladyscribe/pseuds/theladyscribe
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Katabasis: <em>a descent of some type, such as moving downhill, or the sinking of the winds or sun, a military retreat, or a trip to the underworld or from the interior of a country down to the coast</em>.</p><p>They say when your soulmate dies, a part of your soul dies with them. Beau thinks it's a lie because he feels empty, entirely soulless, like a black hole has opened inside his chest and there is nothing that can fill it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Katabasis

**Author's Note:**

> From this anonymous prompt on tumblr: could you do something about Beau/Bortz being separated (b/c of the trade)? (doesn't need to be romantic, more like bromantic? It's completely okay if you don't want to do it.)
> 
> This is apparently all the push I needed to write the Orpheus AU that somebody mentioned they wanted on Stickhandled. I AM SORRY THIS IS REALLY REALLY SAD. Content warning for major character death and taking liberties with the specifics of the original myth while adhering to its general plot. More specific, spoilery warnings are in the end notes.
> 
> Thank you to northisnotup and lostlenore for the beta work on this.

They say when your soulmate dies, a part of your soul dies with them. Beau thinks it's a lie because he feels empty, entirely soulless, like a black hole has opened inside his chest and there is nothing that can fill it.

He wants Borts back, a visceral need that takes precedence over everything. His friends come to see him, to draw him back out into the world, and he sends them away. Geno tries to get him to eat, but everything tastes like ashes.

Not even his piano is a comfort, the sound sour to his ears. He tries to play, to work on the love song he had been writing for Borts, but it is discordant, as if the notes cannot be heard correctly without Borts there.

He stops playing entirely.

He spends his days instead staring out the window at the path to the beach where he last saw Borts. Perhaps if Beau wishes hard enough, Borts will appear at the water's edge, no worse for wear.

But no amount of wanting can bring a man back from death, and Borts never appears on the horizon, never rises from the water like a dream, never slips back into bed smelling of the salt of the ocean.

Beau never thought he could hate the ocean; he has been proven wrong.

*

It is Geno who convinces Beau to go to the land of the Dead. They are going home after making the last of the requisite offerings to Tretiak, the god of the Sea, for safe passage for Borts' soul, Beau still feeling as if he is in a waking nightmare though it's been weeks.

"So sad, Sunshine," Geno says, resting a hand on Beau's shoulder as they walk along the boardwalk. "Go to King of the Dead, ask for him back."

Beau wants to laugh, but the sound catches in his throat. "Why would the King of the Dead grant me such a wish?" he asks, looking down at his empty hands.

"Why would he not? King of the Dead understand loss, you know."

"And how would I get to the Underworld? I don't know the way."

"I'm know a man. He knows how. He help, I'm promise."

Beau pushes away the hope that rises in him, because he knows full well that promises cannot always be kept.

"Okay," he says at last. "Take me to him."

*

Maxim Lapierre hums consideringly when Geno explains what they want. "It is not an easy path," he tells them, "but I know a way. It will cost you."

"Name your price," Beau says with more vehemence than he's felt in weeks.

"I'm not the one you pay. You need gold for crossing the River, you maybe will need extra for getting back across. If you are allowed back across." Lapierre smiles sharply. "You might need more than just gold."

"What more than gold?" Geno asks, and Beau can hear the concern in his voice, like he's second-guessing his own suggestion.

Lapierre shrugs. "Asking the gods for a life, who can say what they want in return? They might want nothing, they might want everything." He cuts his eyes back to Beau. "You will have to prepare for anything."

Beau doesn't flinch. "I'll do whatever it takes."

"Okay then." Lapierre nods solemnly. "Get your gold. We will go in the morning."

*

In the morning, Beau and Geno meet Lapierre at an isolated beach, not too far from where Borts drowned. Beau tries to ignore the soft sound of the waves on the shore as he listens to Lapierre's instructions.

"Remember, do not tell anyone what you bring with you; when you pay him, don't let the Boatman see that you have more gold. If anyone asks, do not tell them why you come to the Underworld until you have spoken with the King and Queen."

Beau nods. "And if they will not speak with me?"

"Then you can only pray they will allow you to leave."

Beau does not voice the thought that to be unable to leave the Underworld would not be the cruelest punishment the King of the Dead could mete.

Instead, he repeats the instructions aloud to Lapierre, who smiles grimly in satisfaction, and the three of them walk along the rocky beach until they reach the open maw of a cave.

"The gate to the Land of the Dead." Lapierre indicates the dark entrance. "Godspeed, Beau."

Before Beau can step inside, Geno grabs his arm. "You sure this what you want, Sunshine?"

"You're the one who suggested it," Beau points out, but he softens when Geno bows his head. "This is what I want, G. I don't think I can live another day without--without him."

He tries to pull away, but Geno drags him into an embrace. "Be careful, Sunshine. Come back if they let you."

Beau takes a deep breath against the wave of worry and affection that threatens to overwhelm him. "I'll do my best," he says, muffled against the cloth of Geno's shirt.

"Okay." Geno lets go of him. "Good luck."

Beau runs a hand over his face and steps into the dark.

*

Beau expects the cave to plunge into blackness as soon as he steps out of sight of the entrance, but the walls of the cave glitter as if lit by the stars. The light is dim, but it is enough to navigate the path deeper into the earth.

He doesn't know how long he walks, but eventually he comes to the River. There is a ferry boat docked at a small pier, and a man sits in the boat, carving what Beau hopes is a piece of wood. When Beau approaches, the man looks up from his work, and his eyes glitter gold in the cave light.

"I seek passage across the River," Beau says, forgetting entirely to offer a greeting.

The man continues to stare at Beau before suddenly standing, setting aside his carving. "I am Sidney, and I ferry the Dead to the other side of the River. But it costs them."

"I have payment." Beau pulls a gold coin from his pocket.

"But you are not dead." Sidney stares at him, his gold eyes unblinking.

Beau looks away from his unnerving gaze. "No." He looks up again, and Sidney still stares. "I can pay you extra," Beau says, pulling two more coins from his pocket.

Sidney takes the coins, pocketing them somewhere in the depths of his cloak. "Take a seat," he says, indicating the rough blankets laid in the bottom of the boat.

Beau sits and watches as Sidney makes the boat ready. They push off from the dock almost silently, Sidney steering them toward the far bank, distant enough that the water seems quite still.

"What brings you here?" Sidney asks as the gondola floats across the River. "You do not need passage to the Underworld yet."

Beau knows he isn't supposed to answer, but he tells the Boatman anyway. "Love," he says quietly, thinking of Borts' smiling face.

Sidney hums but does not say anything more as they drift under the glittering ceiling of the cave, and Beau wonders if that is good or bad.

When they reach the other side of the River, there is another man waiting for Beau.

"Hello, Beau," says the man with a strange smile as Beau steps off Sidney's boat. "I am Hornqvist, aide to the King and Queen. Your presence has been requested in the Hall of the King. If you will follow me."

Hornqvist turns and begins to walk away; Beau hurries behind him, unsure of what to make of the fact that the rulers of the Dead have been waiting for him.

*

The Hall of the King is a grey palace, and at the end of the great room are two grey thrones upon which sit the King and Queen of the Dead. They watch as Hornqvist leads Beau to them, their faces revealing nothing.

When the two of them reach the dais on which the thrones are set, Hornqvist makes a sweeping bow. Beau follows suit, mimicking the bow as best he can, as Hornqvist says, "May I present to you, my lord and lady, Beau Bennett, of Gardena."

"Greetings, Beau," says King Mario, "and welcome."

"Greetings," says Queen Nathalie as well. "What brings you to our lands before your time?"

Beau takes a deep breath. "I've come to ask a favor, my lady."

"What sort of favor?" she asks. "We do not meddle in the affairs of the Living."

"This is not--I have come to ask for the return of a soul," Beau tells her, tripping over his words. "My--I loved--a man, Borts, Robert Bortuzzo, came to you not long ago. I would ask for him back, for he is very dear to me, my soulmate, and I am despondent without him."

"And why would we grant you such a wish?" Nathalie asks, glittering grey eyes boring into Beau. "What could you offer us that we should give him back to you?"

Beau bows his head. "I have brought gold, my lady."

Nathalie's laughter echoes in the hall. "You think the rulers of the Dead have need of gold? Did you come here to ask for a boon or to insult us?"

"No, no, I--" Beau speaks rapidly, trying to buy time before the Queen strikes him dead. She lifts her hand to summon the guards from their posts, and he blurts, "I can give you a song."

"A song?" asks Mario, speaking for the first time since he greeted Beau.

Beau glances at the king before returning his eyes to the queen. "Yes. A song. I can play it for you."

"Very well then, play for us." Nathalie indicates a small dais with a piano to the side of the hall. Beau isn't sure how he had missed it before.

He walks to the dais and sits at the piano, skimming his fingers over the keys. They are cool to the touch and dusty, as if they have not been played in many long years. He wipes his hands against his trousers and sets his fingers over the keys again.

Beau hesitates a long moment before he begins playing the last song he worked on before Borts died. If it is not worthy of his request, then he has nothing to offer that the gods might want.

What had sounded discordant in his empty house by the ocean sounds less so in the great hall of the King of the Dead. Beau nearly stops in surprise, but movement out of the corner of his eye reminds him that he has an audience and must keep going. He plays from memory and improvises as he goes, filling in the blank spaces where he had been unable to find the right notes before. There is discord, still, but it fits, here in this grey hall.

Beau lets himself be consumed by the music. He plays with a feverish intensity, pouring all of his love and grief and hope into the song. It reverberates through the hall, echoing back until it reaches a cacophonous crescendo before he lets it peter back to silence.

The hall is quiet when Beau lifts his hands from the piano and leans back to look at Mario and Nathalie.

"You play well," Nathalie says as he rises from the piano bench.

Beau bows his head. "Thank you."

"Returning someone to the Living is no simple thing. We must account for the souls in our keeping for they are ours to protect." The queen pauses. "We can return Bortuzzo to you, but you must first complete a task."

"Anything, my lady."

Nathalie continues, "When you leave here, Bortuzzo will follow you, but you must have faith in this, for you cannot turn around. If you see so much as a glimpse of him, he will be lost to you forever. Even when you die, you will not be able to reach him."

Beau bows again. The task seems simple enough, the risk not so great--the journey is not so long that he would just give up--and he could hardly ask for more than this chance. "I understand, my lady."

"Do you, Beau Bennett?" interrupts Mario. "If you fail in your task, you will never see him again, even after your own death."

"It is a risk I am willing to take," Beau insists, sure of his words.

"Very well. Hornqvist will lead you out of our lands." Queen Nathalie stares into his eyes again, as if she is looking for something in them. "Remember, Beau, once you leave this hall, you must not look back."

*

Hornqvist does not speak to him as they make their way out of the Underworld. Beau opens his mouth to ask a question, but a sharp look from Hornqvist has him closing it quickly.

Instead, Beau listens, straining for the sound of Borts following behind them.

He hears nothing. No footsteps, no whisper of cloth, no sighing breath. He does not know how closely Borts may be following and cannot turn to see.

Hornqvist leads him back along a different path from the one they took to the Hall of the King, past eerie grey gardens with white flowers and silver trees. Beau tries not to stare at them, at the way they glow faintly in the dim light of the Underworld.

They do not go back to the River where Sidney waits with his boat. Instead, their path goes up and up and up, climbing a mountain Beau had not noticed when he first arrived.

At last, they reach a tunnel, and here Hornqvist stops.

"I've brought you as far as I must," he says. "If you follow this tunnel, you will arrive back in the land of the Living. The terms of your agreement still stand; you cannot look back until you have stepped out of the tunnel. Do you understand?"

"Yes."

Hornqvist bows low, and Beau nods in return.

Beau steps into the tunnel, still listening for Borts, hoping for the click of a pebble on stone or the scrape of a hand against the tunnel wall. There is nothing.

The tunnel seems to go on forever, and finally, Beau cannot take the silence any more.

"I've missed you," he tells the silence behind him. "I could not stand to be without you."

As they walk, Beau tells Borts about his grief, about how he was sick for days, numb with sorrow, about how he could not live without him.

"I came to bring you back. I know it was dangerous, and maybe stupid, but I hope you won't be mad at me for it."

He keeps talking as they keep winding through the tunnel, moving on to inanities when he has run out of important things to say. It is a familiar pattern with them, and it is perhaps because of this that Beau says, "Paulie keeps saying that burritos aren't real food, but they have vegetables in them, so fuck Paulie, you know?" and turns in anticipation of Borts' agreement.

Instead of Borts' half-grin and nod, he's stricken, aghast, and Beau realizes what he's done. He lurches toward Borts, clutching at him in a futile effort to keep him close even as he starts to fade.

"I love you," Borts whispers against his ear, and all Beau can do is choke on a sob as Borts disappears.

Beau stumbles blindly away, lurching out of the tunnel and into startling daylight. He hears shouting as he sinks to the ground, feels the clutch of Geno's hands as his friend bundles him up and takes him home.

Beau shakes his head against all of Geno's questions, unable to answer, unable to feel anything but that great chasm opening in his chest again, wider, emptier than before.

*

That evening, Beau looks out at the water, squinting against the setting sun. He has hated the ocean since it took Borts from him, but now it looks like absolution.

He wades into the water, kicking out against the sand beneath his feet. Beau ducks under the waves, pushing further away from the shore, heading toward the sunset.

He swims and swims and swims, until he feels like his lungs could burst and he has almost forgotten the pain of his loss. He turns to look back at the shore, a thin black line just on the horizon. Beau tilts his head back toward the blinking stars, just beginning to appear as the last rays of the sun slip below the sea.

He could let go now, let himself sink to the bottom of the ocean. But the gods said he would never see Borts again, so death accomplishes nothing. He doesn't know how he could have been so stupid, to think that he could--

He floats, tears burning in his eyes, and when he catches his breath, he begins to swim toward the lights along the shore.

Beau's arms and legs are going numb when he scrapes his hands through sand. He half-crawls his way back onto dry land, collapsing just above the tide line. He rolls on his back, stares up at the black sky, and breathes.

**Author's Note:**

> Content warning for off-screen death of Borts and for a brief contemplation of suicide by drowning.


End file.
